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Movie remake nightmare

Hi there, it’s been a looong while. ^^;;;;;;
One imagines that Covid lockdown would make people more productive…but with me, it made me lazier - and got me obsessed with reading mangas (manhwas and manhuas too) webtoons online. But I’m (hopefully) finally back, and for this occasion I wanna talk about one of my top 3 favorite movies…and in particular why the idea of it getting the “Hollywood remake treatment” makes me freeze in fear and dread, run for the hills or both.

The movie in question is the famous 1985 romantic fantasy masterpiece Ladyhawke, with a super-young Michelle Pfeiffer and Matthew Broderick; I’m not gonna sum up the plot here because I’m quite sure even toddlers know it, but I’m just gonna make a list of (beyond) probable reasons - based on the quality of the more recent remakes that came out - why a Ladyhawke remake is gonna both be abysmal and ruin the magic (and reputation) of the original.
  • WRONG USE OF CGI ::: At the center of the movie, besides the main couple, there are the titular female hawk and a wolf….and, knowing today’s Hollywood, you can bet your a*s they won’t use real animals for the remake, opting instead to reacreate them with CGI - which, no matter how good, will look fu*king awful.
  • DIFFERENT TIME AND SETTING ::: Here too you can bet your a*s that Hollywood will change the historical period and place, maybe even setting it in modern-times America, with their typical “to spice things up/give it an original spin” BS excuse.
  • CHANGING KEY SCENES ::: The original Ladyhawke has some scenes that (imo) really give a strong ‘80s vibe (meaning you can immediately tell by the stylistic choices that they were made in that decade)….and trust me, Hollywood will definitely go on their usual “let’s make it more modern” tangent and change some if not all of them - thus ruining the atmosphere of the whole movie.
  • TERRIBLE CASTING CHOICES ::: Let’s face it: in the last few years Hollywood has gotten wrong the casting choice of 6 if not 7 movies out of 10, and I seriously doubt Ladyhawke will be one of the lucky remaining 3 (or 4)….which of course will make the movie doomed from before shooting starts.
These four are the ones I thought of right on the spot, but if I were to reflect longer several more will come to my mind….serving only to cement that some cinema masterpieces should just be left alone and never remade. For the sake of the movies, sure…but mostly for that of the viewers.

Sorry for the super-long rant, but this has been weighing on my chest for ages now and I had to let it out - thank you to anyone who reads all of it. :3 See you all on next entry.
Take care everybody, and have a wonderful week-end. ♥
Posted on 07.01.2021 • Filed under sorairo • 0 blue skies

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